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When you’re in a raging storm, it seems as if the whole world is like a big ocean that is threatening to capsize your boat. You feel like all the ocean water is coming in. You can’t seem to keep afloat  any more.  The sails are flapping and tearing. You’re afraid that whatever you’re holding on so tightly now, won’t make it. That makes you want to hold on even tighter.  

However, in life, the tighter you hold on to something, the more you feel insecure about it. Like the sails in the boat, the tension must be right.  If it is too tight, in a storm, the rope keeping the sails to the boat may snap. So letting out the rope a little will help to keep the boat afloat. Choose what to hold tightly.

I remembered the time when I was bullied in school.  There was a group of my classmates, who were the top students in class. They’re usually the top 5.  I was averaging at 6th to 9th position. I was at the fringe of this group. I tried ‘fitting’ in at one time. When the bullying started, I realised I was really at the fringe and it wasn’t important any longer to be part of the group.

The bullying happened after one of the critical examinations. When the results were announced, I was surprised to find out that I topped the class.  That’s when the bullying started. I would get snide remarks like ‘she’s a walking dictionary’, you can ask her anything, she’ll answer. Or once when there was no teaching session, a group held me down and they removed my school shoes and threw them out of the window. As the class was located on the second or third floor,  I had to run down and retrieve them. I didn’t fight back then but I was very upset.

I, somehow, knew even then, that they were just being difficult because the group was caught unawares thinking that their academic positions in class, were cast in stone. Previously, they didn’t bother me, as I wasn’t very outstanding or vocal. The bullying was subtle, such as isolating me and physically pushing me around.  I guessed it could have been worse. There must have been an invisible force protecting me.  

I believe some children have it worst. Perhaps it was my earlier years in school that prepared me well for the latter years. But that is a story for another post. 

You must feel that the time you’re experiencing will not end. You can’t even see the light at the end of the tunnel. I assure you, it is there. Just hang on! Don’t take on any shame though. You don’t deserve any of this ill-treatment. No one does.  The bullies are usually more insecure and could even be very hurt people.  Their unresolved hurts have made them aggressors.

Don’t let these hurtful incidents define you. You’ll overcome as long as you don’t let these hurts prevent you from becoming who you’re meant to be. However, if you need help, please approach a responsible adult around you (if you are underage) for help.

These experiences made me more determined to do well academically. Of course I told myself that ‘I will not be like them’. That actually caused me to find  quieter friends amongst  my classmates, especially the ‘underdogs’. Having gone through it, I can identify with them.  So my heart goes out to those anyone who have been bullied, whether it is in school or at work. 

For that time, I remembered doggedly carrying on as usual.  I diligently prepared for my exams, ignoring the insults. Feeling that my best weapon would be to outdo them. That didn’t happen again.  It spurred them to study even harder. My particular ‘horror’ ship arrived on the shore shortly, and I was able to get ‘off’ when I graduated from school. 

I didn’t stay in touch and avoided that group when I saw some of them in high school. Occasionally I dwelt on my not so happy time in school. However, I was glad I had good relationships with my siblings and some good friends that saw me through those difficult times in school. I definitely emerged stronger from it.

With time, there will be others who will recognize your sincerity, which will come through from your actions, not just based on what you say.  It will be revealed to those who matter to you; what your stand was in the conflict. Don’t lose hope.  The storm will soon pass.  Don’t let fear overcome you. 

Your boat just need to cross to the other side of the ocean.  Just hang on till you reached the shore.  To get on the other side, sometimes requires you to just let go. Let go of the people and the material things that ultimately don’t matter. 

There may be something new waiting for you on the other side. But you may have to release what you have in your hand right now. Otherwise if it is too tightly grasped, it can’t take on anything else.

No matter what you’re going through, you’re not too far gone.  Let go of your anxious thoughts!  Your situation may only be as big as the teacup.  Your boat will get to the other side. 

Let go of fear!  Muster up all your courage to move forward.  There is still hope. Hang in there!

Let me share The Teacup Story  below.

Artist: Kat C.          Text: Anna G.